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Marriage Prep

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In a timely post in light of this weekend, John Piper provides some questions to ask when preparing for marriage. Enjoy!

Theology

* What do you believe about…everything?
* Perhaps read through the Desiring God Affirmation of Faith to see where each other is on various biblical doctrines.
* Discover how you form your views. What is the reasoning-believing process? How do you handle the Bible?

Worship and Devotion

* How important is corporate worship? Other participation in church life?
* How important is it to be part of a small accountability/support group?
* What is the importance of music in life and worship?
* What are your daily personal devotional practices? Prayer, reading, meditation, memorization.
* What would our family devotions look like? Who leads out in this?
* Are we doing this now in an appropriate way: praying together about our lives and future, reading the Bible together?

Husband and Wife

* What is the meaning of headship and submission in the Bible and in our marriage?
* What are expectations about situations where one of you might be alone with someone of the opposite sex?
* How are tasks shared in the home: cleaning, cooking, washing dishes, yard work, car upkeep, repairs, shopping for food, and household stuff?
* What are the expectations for togetherness?
* What is an ideal non-special evening?
* How do you understand who and how often sex is initiated?
* Who does the checkbook—or are there two?

Children

* If and when, should we have children? Why?
* How many?
* How far apart?
* Would we consider adoption?
* What are the standards of behavior?
* What are the appropriate ways to discipline them? How many strikes before they’re…whatever?
* What are the expectations of time spent with them and when they go to bed?
* What signs of affection will you show them?
* What about school? Home school? Christian school? Public school?

Lifestyle

* Own a home or not? Why?
* What kind of neighborhood? Why?
* How many cars? New? Used?
* View of money in general. How much to the church?
* How do you make money decisions?
* Where will you buy clothes: Department store? Thrift store? In between? Why?

Entertainment

* How much money should we spend on entertainment?
* How often should we eat out? Where?
* What kind of vacations are appropriate and helpful for us?
* How many toys? Snowmobile, boat, cabin?
* Should we have a television? Where? What is fitting to watch? How much?
* What are the criteria for movies and theater? What will our guidelines be for the kids?

Conflict

* What makes you angry?
* How do you handle your frustration or anger?
* Who should bring up an issue that is bothersome?
* What if we disagree both about what should be done, and whether it is serious?
* Will we go to bed angry at each other?
* What is our view of getting help from friends or counselors?

Work

* Who is the main breadwinner?
* Should the wife work outside the home? Before kids? With kids at home? After kids?
* What are your views of daycare for children?
* What determines where you will locate? Job? Whose job? Church? Family?

Friends

* Is it good to do things with friends but without spouse?
* What will you do if one of you really likes to hang out with so and so and the other doesn’t?

Health and Sickness

* Do you have, or have you had any, sicknesses or physical problems that could affect our relationship? (Allergies, cancer, eating disorders, venereal disease, etc.)
* Do you believe in divine healing and how would prayer relate to medical attention?
* How do you think about exercise and healthy eating?
* Do you have any habits that adversely affect health?

Weekend Update…8/8

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As you may or may not know, we (Me, Meghan, Andrew, Gabriel) are in Colorado Springs, CO for Tyler Dixon’s Wedding this weekend. The wedding is in a few hours at Cathedral Pines Lodge. Rehearsal went well yesterday and wedding is today. Should be a fun time. As you think of them, pray for Tyler and Melanie as they begin their new life together.

Tomorrow, back home at Crestview, Josh Seachris will be filling in, continuing his series through Ecclesiastes. I don’t have it in front of me, but I believe Josh told me that his sermon would be from Ecclesiastes 3 on the Sovereignty of God.

In the evening, the church will continue in worship meeting in small groups to discuss our unity of purpose and how that connects us to one another from Philippians 1:27-30. Hope the weekend goes well there.

Pastors Need Heart Work Too…

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My life really resonated with Thabiti’s recent post on Pride and Preaching. Here’s an excerpt…

oh! how often the heart craves to hear that good report, that positive appraisal of “our” sermon and preaching. And, oh! how often we want to preach for God’s glory and all the while “be known” for preaching for God’s glory. Pride is sneaky, and the preacher is as vulnerable to it as everyone else.

These are great words and counsel. Too often we can forget that before we can boldly thunder God’s Word, we must humbly receive the correction that Word thunders in us. Pray that I would model this kind of humility for the people God’s entrusted to me.

Josh Harris on Correction.

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Earlier this week, Tony Reinke did a post on Josh Harris’ sermon from this past Lord’s Day. The sermon, Lady Wisdom’s Food and Drink, was based on Proverbs 9:1-18.

I had a chance to listen to this excellent sermon today and was freshly convicted about responding to correction. I think all of us in the church would benefit from this sermon. Here’s a summary from Reinke’s post on the spectrum of responses to correction:

The Wise—(1) Loves correction. (2) Pursues correction.
The Growing—(3) Appreciates correction. (4) Begrudgingly accepts correction.
The Simple—(5) Is open-minded to correction. (6) Is indifferent towards correction.
The Fool—(7) Is annoyed by correction. (8) Judges those who correct.
The Scoffer—(9) Hates correction.

Now, today, Josh has posted a PDF outlining a Correction and Encouragement Evaluation. Take advantage of this great resource and see if you don’t grow in wisdom and the fear of the Lord.

Biblical Parenting – Infant to Age 5

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One of Covenant Life Church‘s pastors, Brian Chesemore, gave 2 talks last fall on parenting those aged infant through age 5.

Biblical Principles of Parenting (Part 1) – Audio and PDF
Training, Discipline and The Rod (Part 2) – Audio and PDF

In our church, we have a burgeoning nursery ministry and many parents in this age group. I hope you can take advantage of these excellent resources.

Recap on God..HIs Heart and His People

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I mentioned in a previous post about where we were headed this weekend. Well, today is in the books and it’s time for the diligent work of application.

In the AM, we looked at God’s Heart for the Lost in Luke 15:4-7. I was struck with how I am so religious in my orientation and this keeps me from loving the lost with the same aggressiveness that God does. Lining up my heart with His is what I am called to.

In the PM, we looked at A Stiff Necked People from Hosea 6:7-7:16. God had contention with His people because they are going their own way and being led astray, while seeking to draw near to Him with a shallow repentance. This message struck me in that I am much too casual with sin. It’s an affront to God because of His holiness and justice. Turning to Him in heartfelt repentance is the only prudent action.

Anything stick out to you all?

Serious Discipleship…

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I’ve seen this resource (Fight Clubs: Gospel Centered Discipleship)numerous places on the internet, so when this afternoon presented an open season for fun reading, I took the free pdf download and gave it a read. Awesome stuff. What it really gets at is how accountability groups that make us feel bad aren’t what the Gospel is really all about in conforming us to the image of Christ. This is a better picture. It’s Scripturally-solid, full of practicality and bleeds Gospel. This is a great resource to consider. Download the free pdf or buy this book.

4 Sunday: God and, well, um God…

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Yes, that’s right, we will be very God-centered as we approach the Scriptures tomorrow.

In the AM, we will be looking at the Parable of the Lost Sheep from Luke 15:4-7. We will see God’s heart on display, as He shows compassion for the lost sheep and calls us to joy and many other truths. Does your heart reflect God’s heart for the lost?

In the PM, we will return to Hosea and look at a longer narrative (Hosea 6:7-7:16), addressing some contentions God has with His people in their disobedience. It should be an interesting day of listening to God as He speaks loud and clear through His Word.

Reading Update…

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I posted a reading update a while back and thought it was time for the latest…

As I mentioned in the previous post, I’m really being helped by Lou Priolo’s book Pleasing People: How not to be an “approval junkie”. I can always grow in my battle against pleasing men. And this book gives great help for the sanctification I need to be pursuing in this area.

Manly Dominion by Mark Chanski is a helpful book (so far) on what it means to exercise our role as men and, even more basic, to be the people God created us to be.

Sent by Ed Stetzer will be our small group curriculum this Fall. I’ve read it twice and am going through it one more time very meticulously to get a better feel for how I can use this material in my small group.

I am also going through Elyse Fitzpatrick and Dennis Johnson’s book Counsel From The Cross for the 3rd time. Why? I am so encouraged to read this. Counseling is an area that I need to be consistently growing it. I am swayed that keeping the Gospel central is key to healthy churches and numerous other reasons. This time I am slowly working my way through again.

I also keep reading some in The Mission of God, giving the foundational Biblical and theological underpinnings of missionally reading the Scriptures.

Anything big I’m missing out there?