During the coming weeks (leading to the February HomeWord), I will be thinking a lot about sexual intimacy in a marital relationship that glorfies God. I think often we have this notion that sexual intimacy is something that occurs without any preparation. C.J. Mahaney paints a different picture, though, in his excellent book Sex, Romance, and The Glory of God:

In a strong Christian marriage that glorifies God, a couple’s enjoyment of one another takes place on a long continuum of romantic affection and expression. It’s a continuum made up of many points. Toward one end are things like “companionship” and “fellowship.” Toward teh other end are things like “playful intimacy” and “really serious sex.” But exactly where one point on the continuum begins and the other ends isn’t always clear. That’s because solid Christian marriages are not primarily about one point or the other. They’re about the entire continuum — the relationship itself.

The path to physical intimacy, as another author suggests, “won’t be complete until you’ve cultivated spiritual and emotional intimacy.” How are you in relationship building with your spouse? Maybe what is needed is not therapy about better techinque or better swaying and convincing. What you need is to return to the love you had. Return to loving your spouse for all that they give you — not just the physical, sexual benefits. The path to physical intimacy begins with a love and affection for your spouse in the day to day living of life together. As romance is kindled, the physical intimacy will come and be in proper focus in view of God’s larger glory. Pursue romance in the day to day you will soon know physical intimacy.

Just finished what remains from what has been a busy and fruitful week. I am really anticipating this Sunday’s sermon on the disciples inability to exorcise a demon from a young boy in Mark 9:14-29. Seems they didn’t pray. Odd isn’t it? Ministry in our world today is about so much non-essential stuff. Prayer is a way that we show we are dependent on God.

As for the trip to Sterling. I found those to be most helpful. I got a lot of things accomplished. Wished I would have had more time to do fun reading (out of theological journals no less), but the big things got accomplished. For my first personal retreat, I was encouraged.

I hope you have a blessed weekend and wonderful Lord’s Day.

Oh, and you might save up money for this incredible sale from Sovereign Grace Ministries.

Musing on Psalm 27:7a, (“Hear my voice when I call, O Lord; be merciful to me and answer me.”) Paul Tripp answers the question, Why does God answer my prayers:

1) Because of His love
2) Because of His grace
3) Because of His faithfulness
4) For the sake of His kingdom
5) For His glory

This article is a helpful encouragement for us to cry out to God in prayer. Therefore, pray!

Yes, I’m here in Sterling again for some study and long term planning. Yesterday, God was very gracious and I was able to make some headway on a few projects. I did get a basic preaching schedule outlined for the year. Also got a project done for the elders. I finished designing a camp brochure for our students. Also did some general brainstorming on ministries, seeking ways that we could more effectively “glorify and enjoy God forever, through Jesus Christ.” All is all, it was a pretty good day. Today, I hope to finish my Sunday sermon and do some more long term planning and spend time in prayer. I was encouraged by a sermon by Mike Bullmore yesterday on “Loving the Local Church.” Today, I also listened to some “classic C.J. on ‘Pay Attention to What You Hear'” from New Attitude 2003. These are some good days from God and God is using my time here in remarkable ways.

At the New Attitude website, they have some incredible free audio available online. I would highly recommend Dever’s message on “The Importance of the Local Church.”

…what you hear.

A friend of mine is doing some work on a doctoral dissertation and needs our help. He has an online survey which examines how we listen to expository messages. The site, Expository Listening, would be worth your time to check out.

Last year, I heard a very convicting sermon from Mike Bullmore entitled, “Watch Your Planning: The Strategic Role of Personal Retreats“. Among other things, I was really convicted of my need to get away and prayerfully consider ministry at the local church and to begin to think and pray about long term preaching goals, where and how God is working in our church and other things. So, that brings me to Sterling (College) today and tomorrow. In their library, they have study rooms where I can get alone and secluded. In this time, I am trusting God to meet me as I draw near to Him. There is a good bit of work I have planned to accomplish, but I really just want to commune with my Father and prayerfully seek direction for the coming short-term and ask God for a vision for the long-term. If you read this, would you pray that God would draw near to me in this moment. Ask God to keep my distractions minimal and my aim on Him. I’ll update tomorrow on what I’ve done/learned.

In his book Brothers, We Are Not Professionals, John Piper urges pastors to love their wives. Included in this chapter is a poem written for his son Karsten when he was married. This line stuck out:

A double rule of love that shocks;
A doctrine in a paradox:
If you now aim your wife to bless,
Then love her more and love her less.

What is Piper getting at with these seemingly bizarre words? He is giving us some great, God-centered encouragement for how love for our spouses can be nurtured.

I would say at the outset here, that men, we are to take the lead in this. Our cue in loving our wives comes from Christ and the self-sacrificing, devoted love He displayed for His bride, the church. Men this is especially true of us.

Women, you aren’t exempt either. The teaching that accords with sound doctrine in Titus 2:1 involves training women to love their husbands. There are women who have misunderstandingly tried to appropriate their role as being submissive and respectful, but not loving. This isn’t a Scriptural notion. Women, nurture love for your husband.

Now, back to Piper, how does this happen.

1) It means loving your spouse more than you love yourself. You to put him or her above your own selfish desires. This is the essence of what love is in 1 Corinthians 13. If you want to have love for your spouse that is good and healthy, you have to die to the selfish things you want.

2) It means loving your spouse less than you love Jesus Christ. Don’t idolize your spouse. Don’t break the second commandment and put them above Jesus. Love Jesus supremely and the overflow of that love be a heartfelt, passionate love for your spouse.

So, as Piper would say, we confess and agree…

If you now aim your wife to bless,
Then lover her more and love her less.

Our leadership team has been really impressed with Tim Keller’s sermons and writings. Recently, Justin Taylor interviewed Keller about his upcoming book. It looks and sounds very exciting.

For today’s free audio of the week, I return to Piper. Piper preached a sermon entitled “Receive With Meekness the Implanted Word” on Sunday, January 6. Like our church, Piper’s church does a prayer week. The first Sunday is a sermon on prayer and the second is one on the Word of God. This was why this sermon was so encouraging to me. Healthy prayers (or in the case of our recent emphasis, Spiritual prayers) without the steady and life-giving flow that comes from God’s Word. Check out this sermon for yourself.