Funeral - From One Degree to Another

This past week has been a whirlwind for our family. I was planning a quick trip to my Mom’s with the boys to take in a Cardinal game and on the day I was set to leave, we got word that my Gma (Mom’s mom) had taken a turn for the worse and she was gone by Noon on Sunday (July 7). We loaded up the family for the drive to my Mom’s and ended up staying around 9 days, helping our family in various ways. For my kids, it was a chance to connect with their cousins. For the adults, it was time to stand with our family in remembrance, then dig through all the leftover stuff, and begin to start to figure out where do we go from here. Here’s the eulogy (or remembrance) of her life I gave at the service:

Eulogy for Peggy LeMay

The Bible tells us in Ecclesiastes 3:1 that “for everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven.” I use this passage of Scripture every time I get the privilege to be a part of remembering someone’s life because it reminds me that the Bible is a practical book, full of help no matter where we are. Today, as we grieve the loss of Evelyn (Peggy) Lemay, who I knew as Gma, the Bible is up to the challenge of meeting me where I am. And, as a pastor, I would say to you that no matter where you’re at, the Bible can meet you where you are. We learn in the Bible that this there is a time for everything under heaven.

A time to give birth…

Grandma was born on Monday, November 12, 1917 in Franklin County, Illinois the daughter of Clyde and Euna (May) Ezell.

A time to die…

She died at 12:15 P.M. this past Sunday, July 7, 2013 at Green Tree in Mt. Vernon, Illinois.

The Bible says there’s a time to mourn and a time to dance…

While we are here to mourn the loss of Grandma, we’re really happy for her right now. Her faith has become sight. Her suffering and pain in this life is over. Today, we want to celebrate Gma’s life and remember those great memories we have of her. These past few years have been hard on the family as Gpa and Gma declined in health. I know many of us saw firsthand this slow decline has been an ever pressing pointer that one day, mourning would come. So, this is a time to mourn. We’ll miss this amazing woman. We’ll miss her humor. Which, leads us to that time to dance. One memory we heard about was how when she was a little girl, her dad would make her dance for company that would come over. She would dance the Charleston for them. Some of the family got Gma to replicate this dance routine on the beach in South Carolina one year. So, when the Bible speaks of a time to mourn and dance, we think of Gma.

There’s also a time to plant…

Planting reminds us of a couple things about Grandma…

1) Much like Gpa, she planted into her family. She married Everett on December 6, 1942 in Mt. Vernon and was a loyal wife to him for the 69 years God gave them together. They had 3 children – Pat, My Mom (Linda), and Carl. Pat married Tom and they had some children: Chad, who preceded Gma to heaven, Krista, and Stefani. Krista and Stefani gave Gpa & Gma more great grandkids with Ava, Jordan, Aaron and Randon. Linda married Rick, who also preceded Gma to heaven and had me, Holly and Clint. Our spouses, Meghan, Todd and Melissa gave us a host of other great grandkids: Andrew, Gabe, Lauren, Micah, Leah, Anna, Ethan, Tyler, Caleb and Bella. On top of this family, Grandma was a regular player in the Lemay Family Reunion festivities and also spent lots of time planting into her Ezell family. I know when I was younger, Grandma was there to serve and care for her Mom, making those trips to Benton and West Frankfort often.

2) For those of us who knew Grandma closely, though, when we hear of a time to plant this immediately makes us think of her selfless service to the needs of others. This began with her faithfulness to Grandpa. She was so patient with him. The Bible speaks of a time to keep silenceand Gma would quietly follow Gpa where he went. Grandpa was a man with a plan. He would sometimes point that finger in Gma’s back to get her moving. Or, stop the car and hop out to go somewhere, walking before Gma got out of the car, but she was there for him and was the love of his life. I remember traveling with them and stopping only to have Gma pull out of the bags around her feet a bag of cookies (or sometimes lunch) and a thermos of coffee to get grandpa the boost to keep him buzzing. The mug of coffee and cookie really gave us all the shot in the arm we needed, cause Grandma could cook.

Grandma planted into the lives of others as a cosmetic dealer. Many of us ended up getting Vanda for Christmas because of Gma. She was also an accomplished author. I was in a Barnes and Noble about 8 years ago and saw the Pastors Wives Cookbook and there, on numerous pages, was the peppering of recipes from one Peggy Lemay. We also have pages of journals that she wrote telling us her story.

As a matter of fact, many of my memories growing up surrounded Gma in the kitchen. Whether it was fixing me what I liked or creating traditions that we will never forget like cheesy carrots, White Christmas pie or cookies on demand. Even the funeral home people commented on how Gma would bring cookies to them. She simply planted her life in service to Grandpa and others. She was a faithful pastor’s wife in each setting God led them. And, at the base of this was a love for God. The Bible tells us that Jesus didn’t come to be served but to serve and give His life as a ransom for many. While Grandma wasn’t perfect, she did embody this life of service to others. You could say that she decreased so that others could increase.

The Bible contrasts a time to tear with a time to sew…

Gma could sew. If you entered that room where she spent her last hours, you’d see the fruit of that labor. She had that meticulous eye. I have something she sewed in my kitchen at home. And, Gma was skilled in this. She also loved her bling bling. She loved jewelry. She was a ladies’ lady. Exhibiting grace in her appearance and living, what spoke loud from her was her quiet, submissive spirit.

The Scriptures speak of A time to embrace…

Grandma always did this. The ladies that cared for her in the nursing home told me that Grandma was always loving on them. The Bible also mentions a time to heal and being wrapped up in this loving woman was very healing for all of us. And, again, each of us who are family remember the love of this woman: Grandma giving us that kiss on the cheek. Her tender care for each of us made us melt with the love in which we were enveloped. She was that good grandma you always envisioned.

A time to laugh…

We have so many lighthearted memories of Grandma which bring a smile to our faces. I think of her leaning by Mom’s back door with her foot up on the counter like Holly. Or, after one of our post-Christmas shopping trips, hiding some purchases from Grandpa in the bushes out front. Or hiding stuff in general. Once when they moved, Grandma would load the car under the cloak of darkness, so that Gpa didn’t discard any of her “treasures.” Or, to use Biblical language, Grandma viewed most things as a time to keep whereas Gpa saw things as a time to throw away. There’s so many Christmas and vacation memories I have, as well.

Above all, I am grateful to God for giving me such an amazing woman as a grandmother. Seeing the legacy that she left on our family, the way she selflessly served others, her faithfulness through the thick and thin of church life, the skill she had in cooking. These are the type of amazing gifts that God gave us in this woman and we praise Him today for her.

This morning is the Memorial Service for my Grandpa, Gene Auxier. He’s one of the most faithful men I had the privilege of knowing in my life. Since my father was a pastor and I pastor, I didn’t get to hear him preach that often, but can still remember his fervency in the pulpit in those times I did.

The best I can piece together his story, God called him out of working on the railroad to preach and minister. In my conversations with him, he remembered a simpler time. He didn’t grow up with a lot of luxury. His parents were farmers (at least Grandpa could remember slaughtering the pig and putting it up for the winter). Even growing up, I can remember being intrigued by his simple way of living.

In these last few years, he was diagnosed and battled leukemia. I had the opportunity to visit with him a little over a week ago and his faith was firm to the end. He would often remind me that God was in control and the best was yet to come.

I’m grateful that now his faith is sight. The fight is over and in Christ, He knows the firstfruits of eternal life. I hope today is a day that brings glory to the Savior who made all of this possible.

Weekend Recap – Funeral / Jesus’s Hour

Losing My Mom’s Mom (Tribute To Gma L)

My Grandpa Auxier

My Grandpa’s Passed On…