Isn’t it often the case that we don’t suspect ourselves. We think everyone else is the world is the problem. In my Wed PM class, we are reading through D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones excellent work, Studies in the Sermon on the Mount. In the chapter on denying self and following Christ, he writes:
Whenever I notice in myself a reaction of self-defence, or a sense of annoyance or a grievance, or a feeling that I have been hurt and wronged and am suffering an injustice — the moment I feel this defensive mechanism coming into play, I must just quietly face myself and ask the following questions.
“Why exactly does this thing upset me?”
“Why am I grieved by it?”
“What is my real concern at this point?”
“Am I really concerned for some general principle of justice and righteousness?”
“Am I really moved and distubed because I have some true cause at heart?”
“Or, let me face it honestly, is it just myself?”
“Is it just this horrible, foul, self-centeredness and self-concern, this morbid condition into which I have got?”
“Is it nothing but an unhealthy and unpleasant pride?”Such self-examination is essential if we are to conquer in this matter.
This was so enlightening to me. I am usually the root behind the problem. My reaction happens because I have an issue I am dealing with. Yes, it usually is just myself (if I was honest). It is just my horrible, foul, self-centeredness and self-concern. It is a morbid condition into which I have gotten. I plead with you to follow the Doctor’s counsel here and put the probe of self-examination upon your life. See if the light of the Gospel doesn’t reveal the sins of self.